As the song says – “life is a roller coaster, just gotta ride it”, and life can certainly seem like a series of ups and downs, with each transition bringing with it unique challenges and opportunities for growth. Whether it’s starting a new job, navigating relationships, having children, or finding a new sense of self, life transitions can often seem daunting and overwhelming. However, letting go of the old and embracing the new can also be transformative and empowering, and here we will look at some strategies to help us navigate transitions and come out stronger on the other side.
What are life transitions?
Life transitions are significant changes that alter our circumstances, and are as much about how we mentally and emotionally adapt to change as they are about the physical aspects of that change. There are transitions that can be planned for, such as reaching a certain age, going to college, or getting married, and there are others that come upon us unexpectedly, such as bereavement, illness, or a breakdown in relationship. These transitions can trigger a range of emotions – from excitement to fear or anxiety, and can often leave us doubting ourselves and our capacity to cope with these changes. A first step in embracing transitions is to recognise that they are a natural part of life, and you are never alone in facing these challenges.
Five ways to manage life transitions
1. Acknowledging what you’re feeling
The emotions that surface during life transitions can often be overwhelming and unwanted, but it’s important that we at least acknowledge what we’re feeling in the moment. Putting on a brave face and denying or suppressing our emotions can lead to further issues such as irritability, trouble sleeping, or panic attacks.
Keeping a journal of our experiences, feelings and thoughts, can often help us articulate what we’re feeling in a safe way, and can be a useful first step in processing our emotions. Talking to a trusted friend or a qualified therapist in confidence can also be helpful, allowing us gain new perspectives and the tools to navigate transitions in a supportive environment.
2. Considering new perspectives
Life transitions can bring uncertainty about what the future will bring and being anxious about the unknown is to be expected. Change can also bring with it new opportunities, and a shift in perspective can help us reframe anxiety as excitement, shifting to a mindset that allows us approach challenges with curiosity rather than fear.
Making a list of potential positive outcomes can help us embrace new perspectives during periods of change and maintain a growth mindset. For example, if you are changing job, consider all the new friendships that might form and the skills you will develop in the new role.
3. Setting realistic goals
Setting goals can give us a sense of purpose and direction during times of change, but do understand that it will take time to adjust to major life transitions. It’s important therefore not to put too much pressure on ourselves and set realistic expectations of what we can achieve right now. Change doesn’t happen overnight, but we can take small steps towards our goals and celebrate small victories along the way to reinforce our confidence.
Setting SMART goals – Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time bound – is a well-known framework to follow and makes it easier to define tangible goals and track progress along the way.
4. Cultivating self-care
Practicing self-care as a regular habit is important in maintaining our mental health and helping us avoid unhealthy coping behaviours, such as excessive alcohol or drug use. What self-care looks like in practice is unique to each one of us and it is important to choose activities that best suit you and your lifestyle, so they can be maintained over time.
Practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and physical activity can help enhance mental and emotional well-being. Joining clubs or activity groups can also be beneficial in building a wider social circle, creating a support network and reminding us that we’re not alone.
5. Grieving the loss
Life transitions can bring with them new opportunities and unexpected and rewarding experiences, but even these positive changes can emerge amidst a feeling of grief for what once was. Being patient with ourselves and recognising that feelings of regret or loss might emerge unexpectedly is all part of the process of letting go.
Allowing yourself the permission to grieve when those feelings emerge can be helpful. There is no right or wrong way to grieve but it’s important we allow ourselves to move on whilst honouring what once was.
Conclusion
Life transitions are a natural and inevitable part of life and how we approach them can make all the difference to how they’re experienced. By acknowledging our feelings, considering new perspectives, setting realistic goals, cultivating self-care and grieving what we’ve lost, we can navigate these changes with grace and confidence. Some life transitions are more challenging than others of course, and if you do find that your life is negatively impacted you might consider seeking the help of a qualified therapist, who will be there to listen and support you on every step of your journey.